ringing in the new year.

New Years is a little bittersweet. For one, it's just a ignoramus reminder that you're only getting older. But it's also a time to get a little giddy of the new things to come. It's a great refreshing start. This year, could be a new you, a better you, an improved you. The push back for me is, getting this new start ain't too easy when you are going full throttle in the month of January. January sort of makes me wanna cry. There is still snow on the ground and you have no Christmas carols to justify the goodness of it, and some how, some way, the temperature has plummeted to the negatives. Also, you wake up the first of the month and look back to the night before and remind yourself how New Years Eve is always a bust and you regret not kicking it low in your pjs and bingeing on pizza while watching dick clark as a fire is crackling. Screw the new years eve kiss, it just never adds up to what you thought it would be.

You're thinking my mindset is pretty negative right now, I know, but really it's not; I'm just facing reality and learning to get over it with a shrug and a smile. Going full force with your goals actually gives me a rush and I can't be stopped. My girl, Riss told me the other day that she's an all or nothing kind of gal. I can back her up and say that this is completely true, and for that, I truly admire.

So, goal number 1 : become an all or nothing kind of gal. If I'm going to make goals, and be for real, I best not break them, no matter what the circumstance is. For there is nothing greater than achieving your goals and experiencing the process and witnessing the results.

Goal number 2 : i will hold myself to a standard of grace, not perfection. I hate to admit this to myself, but last year was a year of constantly going at war with myself and comparing myself to others. fashion blogs really make me wanna spew. To me, all it is are beautiful girls throwing their wardrobes in your face and showing off what they can afford and what you can't. Sometimes, I go crazy with how the internet has allowed women to become so vain. Vanity has really taken a toll on me, in a frustrating way. My friend Nik and I were in a conversation over the phone and she had made a comment that I don't remember right off the bat, but it was something along the lines of, how she has become comfortable with herself in a humble way to the point where she doesn't have to compare herself to others because she is proud of who she has become. Touche' Nicolette. What a great example to have as a woman. So, I will begin to purge the vainess of the world, out of my life if that's what it takes. I need to recognize that I am not perfect, nor will I ever be, but as long as I am trying and pushing myself towards these goals of being better as a human being, I will have a standard of grace.

Goal number 3 : for heavens sake, finish that Vintage American Vogue painting that you drool over all the time. MAKE TIME FOR YOUR TALENTS. Uh, see that American vintage cover of Vogue up there? I decided to paint that sucker last summer. That was the summer of 2012, and I planned on finishing it before July 4, 2012. And did it happen, um no, not quite. So my next goal was to finish it this Christmas Break. No, it's not finished yet, and yes I still have t-minus five days until my vacation is over and another artistic semester has begun. So... I've gotta make some time. I have to finish that painting even if it's the death of me. I love it so much, you would think it would have been framed and hung by now but my time management is the pits and I really need to get a grip.

Goal number 4 : moisturize, moisturize, moisturize. I am a crazy person. I have been going loco since I got married. Because I got married, I all of a sudden think I've hit a mile stone in my life and I'm over the hill and aging. I need to slow it down, take it down a notch and come to terms with growing up and while doing so simply grow up! Also I need to recognize that I am still young, I am 23 for crying out loud and if you fear of aging and you know you're doing to do so naturally then buck up and start now! So a moisturizing I will go, morning and night, face and neck and the whole sha-bang. I can't prevent wrinkles, but I can slow it down. Also remember, aging is beautiful if you are healthy and natural. But in all seriousness, I need to take better care of my skin.

Goal number 5 : eat right, get fit. just freaking do it. day two and so far, so good. I've made it to the gym two days in a row and I feel like a queen. I don't know about you, but all of the evil holidays back to back to back have been extremely scrumptious and my taste buds thank you for that, but my poor body... heavens be has no idea what I've done to it. My breathing has changed. Yeah, it really has, I breath like I am carrying 500 tons on my back. It's embarrassing. On top of that I feel flat out disgusting. My 4th of July dress doesn't zip up anymore and let's just say all of my printed toothpick pants aint so hot on my bod right now. Really, this is just a matter of wanting to live a long a healthy life and being good to my body. Remember, your body is a Temple. Treat it with respect and kindness, be aware of what you intake. Don't deprive yourself, but don't kill yourself at the same time. I just want to say holla to  myself over the fact that I easily didn't have to go to the gym today. I woke up with my left eye feeling as though knives were stabbing it and it was watering like crazy! I could hardly keep it open and when I walked outside the sun was sin! I thought I had gone blind. I thought, oh i'll just wear my glasses while I run. But then I remembered that my glasses are so stretched out that they fall down my nose constantly. So, I bucked up, wore my glasses with my sunglasses on top of them. Drove to the gym, which luckily is just right around the corner. Locked my glasses in the car and did my workout at the gym blind as a bat. completely blind. I deserve an award. Where is my award?

Goal number 6 : spend less time on your computer, make more time behind a book and the scriptures. enough said. the internet is the devil. I have wasted so much time in my life on this stupid thing, and here I am blogging to "you" who may not even exist because I doubt anyone reads this flippin' thing but I can't help that I still like to do it. shoot me.

Goal number 7 : learn the charleston, and learn how to swing & jive. it's your favorite dance and it will make you happy. 
It's true. I love to dance. I danced all throughout middle school and high school and though I wasn't serious about it, because art was my main squeeze, I danced because it made me happy. Unfortunately, I feel as though my favorite kind of dance is forgotten and If it can't be brought back into the world, it will be brought back into mine, by learning it. I love the decade of the twenties, I dream about it, and research it all the live long day, and a long with it comes the dancing of the Charleston. From the 20's to the early 50's I could do the charleston every day on top of Swing dancing. If I could snap my fingers and have Mr. Louis Armstrong jive away on his brass instruments in my own living room, I would in a heart beat and I'd zoot suit riot all day. I want to drag the Zoo into this, seeing as how eh, I kind of need a partner. Knowing that he'll most likely decline, my feelings will be crushed because there is no way in having Leon James, Gene Kelly or Fred Astaire come into my life. So, sorry Zekey,  I'm taking you down with me.

Goal number 8 : bring your southern roots into your life no matter your location. get down and dirty in the kitchen and finally master the art of cajun creole cooking! I cry, I cry all of the time that I am in Utah and no where near Georgia. It's pathetic, but I guess it's living proof that I seriously adore and am so grateful for where I come from and that the South is my home. I am so proud of southern traditions and the southern hospitality, the way of life down there and I miss it all too much. I go in crying spirtz and I know that it drives the Zoo crazy. I do believe I am a blonde form of Scarlett O'Hara and that I just cry and cry over my Tara. At least you know I am real. I was talking to Nik again, and she was saying how her and our friend Chad are choosing one word to describe their year of 2013 and to live by it. I think mine is BUCK -UP. No, I don't live in Georgia or South Carolina, or Louisiana, or Alabama, or Tennesse, or North Carolina, I live no where close to the deep south. And that's okayyyyy (really it's not okay with me at all, but my buck-up self is saying that it is.) So what can my sad sad self do to fix this awful, just awful solution, bring my southern ways to wherever I may be! So I am going to become a white version of my favorite lady, Minnie Jackson and cook up a storm and learn to cook my favorite home cook meals of the south. I am going to share it's goodness with my friends here is Utah and start a tradition and throw a Southern Summer Bash party. I also want to start a tradition where the zoo and I will have a scrumptious Cajun creole dinner for New Years Eve.

Goal number 9 : take the zoo to charleston, south carolina. I am slowly brainwashing the zoo to my devious southern ways. So far, I have obviously taken him to The Gem City of the South, Marietta, Georgia : my hometown where my family still resides. We've traveled to Atlanta, Hilton Head Island, Savannah and now our next top in the brainwashing escapade Charleston, South Carolina. 

Goal number 10 : feast more upon your favorite classics with your favorite gals and gents! grace, audrey, carey, jimmy and alfred galore! Im a true sucker for the classic films giving credit to my dad and his great taste in film. If I love it so much, and it makes me happy, then I need to add more of it into my life. The latest has been "It's A Wonderful Life" "White Christmas" and "Sabrina" starring Audrey Hepburn. Bring em on to me!

Goal number 11 : just simply be more kind, more loving, more thoughtful and more positive. think before you speak and pray to have good thoughts throughout your day. 

I hope you all have a happy New Years Eve and whatever your goals be, may you stick to them and be ever so thrilled with the outcome! I wish you luck and a happy new year!